Bad Jokes

A man was seen with six children in tow.
A man walked into a store with six children in tow.
The store owner asked, "These kids are all yours?"
The man replies, "Nope, these are customer complaints. I work in a condom factory."
A young boy asks his father, "What is the difference between confident and confidential?"
Father said,"Well, you are my son, I am very confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, now, that is confidential!"

Don't Feel Bad About It

Impotence is just Mother Nature's way of saying, "No hard feelings..."

It Is Hard To Be A Teacher

A teacher was talking about blood circulation in the human body.

"Now, class, if I stand on my head, my face would turn red from the increased in blood."

"But why is it that when I am standing upright, the blood do not accumulate and turn my feet red?"

A little boy replied,"Is it because your feet are not empty?"

Watch You Say To A Child

A little girl asked, "Mummy, why are some of your hairs white?" 

The mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something that make me unhappy, one of my hairs turns white." 

The little girl thought for a while and asked,"Mummy, is that why all of grandma's hairs are white?"

Buying A Cow

Little Larry went to buy a cow together with his father.

He watched as his father moved from animal to animal, running his hands up and down the cow's legs and slapping the rump hard.

After a few minutes, Larry asked, “Dad, why are you doing that?”

His father replied, “Because I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy.”

Larry looked worried. He said, “Dad, I think the milkman wants to buy Mom .....”

Politicians

A car load of <insert your preferred party here> politicians were involved in a traffic accident in the countryside while on the campaign trail.
A farmer rushed to the scene but found the passengers dead. So he buried all the passengers.
A few days later, the police came to interview the farmer and was told that all the passengers were buried.
The policeman asked,"Are you sure that they are all dead?"

The farmer said, "Well, one fellow was screaming that he is still alive when I was burying him"
The policeman was dumbstrucked.

The farmer continued,"You know how it is, them politicians never tell the truth."

Men Just Don't Get What Women Are Saying

A man was driving down a country road and was coming to a blind corner.
A lady driver came around the bend, lean over and yelled,"DONKEY!"
The man was infuriated. He leaned out the window and shouted back,"BITCH!"
He was smug at his quick reaction and comeback. His car went round the corner and ran smack into a donkey standing in the middle of the road.
Men just don't get what women are saying.